Switching Point of View

I'm a "guest lecturer" at Romance University today on switching POV. With diagrams. :-) Feel free to pop over and ask questions! And tell me what works for you in changing POV as a reader or as a writer.

Handouts - Deep POV

Liberty States Fiction Writers, March 2012

From CAROLINA HOME, Virginia Kantra, July 2012

Virginia Kantra - Deep POV Handout 1

They were talking about her like she wasn’t even there.

Fine. Direct internal thought Taylor stared Proper name, anchoring verb.at the plate of cookies until they blurred. Her throat ached. Not “She’s crying, ” but how does it feel to cry?It’s not like she wanted to be here anyway. She wanted to be home in her little blue bedroom in the house she shared with Mom.Internal thought. Communicates not only mental response, but attitude.

But she couldn’t think about her mother without crying. She swallowed hard.

“Taylor.” Luke—she wasn’t going to call him Dad, no matter what the letter said—touched her shoulder. “Say hi to your Uncle Matt.”

Uncle.Direct internal thought.

The word thumped into her like a fist. Visceral response. And if it the image is from her experience, it should force the reader to wonder. She already had an uncle. She didn’t want another one.

“Hi, Taylor.” He had a nice voice, deep and kind of quiet.

She shot him a look from under her cap brim. He was wider and older than her... than Luke Her thought patterns, her attitude, with darker hair and eyes and big hands. Taylor looked at the jagged white scar running across his knuckles Significant, specific detail and felt kind of sick and out of breath, like she’d had the wind knocked out of her on the playground. Age appropriate simile

She didn’t say anything. Because we are feeling what Taylor feels, seeing what she sees, I don’t have to explain why

He regarded her silently a moment. “I can see a resemblance.”

Tess nodded. “She has Luke’s eyes.”

“I was thinking she had his attitude,” he drawled.

Stung, Taylor jerked her gaze up. Her Uncle Matt smiled at her crookedly. She observes this. She doesn’t know/I don’t have to say how Matt feels. Her stomach cramped. She ducked her head. Visceral response/physical cue.

She didn’t want him smiling at her.

She hunched her shoulders, slumping deeper in the chair. She didn’t want him noticing her at all. Why not? Create suspense. Maintain secret. Set up character goal.

***

The kid was scared, Matt realized. Internal thought, proper name, anchoring verb.

Not just nervous at meeting her new family or grieving at losing her mother but as angry and anxious as one of the island’s feral cats Simile appropriate to environment and as determined not to show it.

Poor kid. Direct internal thought.

Matt looked at Luke. “Where’s she been the last four weeks?” The last ten years. “Who takes care of her?” White lines bracketed his brother’s mouth. Matt sees this. He doesn’t know/I don’t have to tell you how Luke feels. “I do now. She’s been staying with her mother’s parents. Until the will was probated.”

“You remember the Simpsons, Matt,” Tess said. “Ernie and Jolene?” Back story revealed here and below through dialogue and deep POV.

Dare Island had a year-round population of fifteen hundred souls. Matt knew most of them. Ernie Simpson had worked at the fish house until it shut down, eight years back, and he moved off island with the rest of his family. The son, Kevin, was a few years younger than Matt and a real tool. Matt's vocabulary. The daughter . . .

“You dated Dawn Simpson,” he said to Luke. “Back in high school.”

Dated being the nicest word Matt could think of for screwed every chance you got.

“Did you know about . . .” Matt’s gaze cut to the kid in the chair.

Luke shook his head, still looking grim around the mouth. Observation “Not until the lawyer contacted me in Kandahar a month ago.”

Well, that was something. The situation still sucked, but at least his brother was taking responsibility. The way Matt remembered, Luke had been pretty broken up when Dawn dumped him their senior year and started banging Bo Meekins. More backstory

Matt wondered if his brother had demanded a paternity test. Create suspense.

Not a question he could ask in front of the kid. Anyway, she looked like him, same clear blue eyes, same kiss-my-ass chin. Significant, specific detail

Luke, a father.

Matt could hardly believe it.Sets up character dilemma

All rights reserved.

Write on Wednesday: the Pitch Appointment

Romance Writers of America meets in NYC next month! So it seems a good time to reprise my advice about editor and agent appointments.

I met my first editor, Mary-Theresa Hussey, at a pitch appointment back in the days when she was a lowly assistant editor at Silhouette and I hadn't yet completed my first manuscript. (This was so long ago you could get away with that.)

Mind you, it took me four years to write a story she could actually buy. But that meeting gave me hope and was the start of a working relationship that lasted ten years.

So let's say you're headed to New York. You score an appointment with the agent you most covet or the editor you want at the house of your dreams. You have ten minutes to convince her that you are a perfect match. Now what do you say?

First of all, relax. No matter how you feel inside, this is not the do-or-die moment of your career. Remember that the editor wants to like your book. All you have to do is describe your story in words that will let her know what it's truly about. I can't find my own high concept with both hands in the dark. But I can talk succinctly about story because of Debra Dixon's wonderful explanation of goal, motivation, and conflict. Because of her, I can offer

Virginia Kantra's Cheat Sheet to Perfect Pitch

Start:"Thank you for taking the time to meet with me."Say a few words about the publisher or agent that suggests you've done your homework, read their authors' work. This means, of course, that you have done your homework, that you know that this agent represents your genre and you are not pitching your sweet Christian romance to an erotica publisher.

I've written a word count, subgenre
set in location and/or time period.

My Title is about a character tag (descriptive adjective and specific noun)
Fighting/striving/struggling for character goal
because character motivation
But conflict (why can't she have what she wants?)

The other primary character (hero or heroine)
is a character tag
who wants character goal
so that character motivation
But conflict.

A sentence about how the romance is affected by or impacts the plot.

A sentence about how the characters work together or at cross purposes to defeat the antagonist or overcome the conflict.

A sentence establishing your area of expertise or level of excitement about this story.

Finish by telling her what you want: "I would like to send you the story."

Don't be thrown if the editor asks questions about your story. This means she's interested.

You can ask questions, too. They probably get tired of, "What are you looking for?" But you could certainly ask specific questions about projects you have simmering on the back burner. Which brings me to,

Have a second pitch prepared in case the editor says this project doesn't meet the needs of her house at this time or asks what else you are writing.

As I mentioned above, you want to do your research before you even request any appointment. Make sure you have visited
Agent Query - An excellent guide to what an agent is and how to submit to one,
along with a free, searchable database of over 700 agents.

as well as Preditors and Editors
Another Realm hosts this guide to literary agents and publishing houses.

And good luck!

(You can find an earlier version of this post and other articles about writing on my website.)

Emotion Workshop Handout

Adding Emotion, Making a Sale - Workshop Handout
Virginia Kantra

New Jersey Romance Writers
October 2010


Solid writing skills don’t guarantee sales. An emotionally compelling story does. Award-winning author Virginia Kantra shares practical strategies you can use to hook readers’—and editors’—emotions.

BIG PICTURE

What the editor says/What you can do about it:
1. She says: “I don’t feel there’s enough keeping the hero and heroine apart.”
You do: Choose an essentially emotional conflict (based on well-motivated emotional need) that is more important than/aggravated by the external conflict.
It has to be deep; personal; increasingly complicated with rising stakes.
The conflict must pose a threat to the h/h’s very sense of self.
How? Goal, Motivation, Conflict; scene selection.

2. She says: “The plot overshadows the romance.”
You do: Remember, It’s the relationship, stupid.
Why must these two people - and not any others - be together?
What do they discover/appreciate/challenge in each other?
Scene selection.

3. She says: “I just didn’t care about the characters.”
You do: Create a likable, sympathetic heroine readers can identify with and a
sexy (redeemable) hero they can fall in love with
How? Show motivation to engage reader’s sympathy through backstory, dialogue
Using sequel structure to engage reader’s emotions.

IT’S IN THE DETAILS

4. She says: “I feel the characters need to communicate more.”
You do: Use dialogue to reveal character; to create and sustain conflict; to develop intimacy.
How? VK’s Rule of Dialogue:
“If your character can think it, she can say it.
It’s better if she says it to the hero.
Best of all if they fight about it.”

5. She says: “I just didn’t love this story enough.”
You do: BE the character. The story always matters to the central characters. The more we are the characters, the more we care.
Dialogue alone isn’t enough. Engage the reader on a visceral, sensory level.
How? Consistent dominant mood to avoid jerking the reader around.
Use significant, specific detail (including setting & symbolism) to add emotional truth, urgency.
Use Point of View. Deep POV; choice of POV; differences in male/female POV.


Big Picture Hands-on Exercise: “It’s the relationship, stupid.”

My hero admires my heroine’s ____________________________.

He uncovers/appreciates her ______________________________.

He’s challenged by her __________________________________.

Do the same for the heroine.
What are the scenes that move the romance forward by showing these qualities?